Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
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