I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
