these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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