Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.

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  (612): I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous. http://tfl.nu/oxg9
  Replies (18) Good night (5024) Bad night (721)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I love boston

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  (781): The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH (781): I love boston http://tfl.nu/jz0y
  Replies (37) Good night (8763) Bad night (1246)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account

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  (251): you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account http://tfl.nu/ufbc
  Replies (20) Good night (5518) Bad night (1376)
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  (510): View more from California

  Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.

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  (510): Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight. http://tfl.nu/a7yq
  Replies (24) Good night (5364) Bad night (1191)
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  (805): View more from California

  WHY are the edges of my bra charred???

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  (805): WHY are the edges of my bra charred??? http://tfl.nu/czt9
  Replies (12) Good night (3444) Bad night (1174)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.

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  (708): I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious. http://tfl.nu/uku0
  Replies (16) Good night (1722) Bad night (3439)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.

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  (305): so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/ez3t
  Replies (24) Good night (4214) Bad night (1393)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed

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  (704): dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed http://tfl.nu/q2zi
  Replies (8) Good night (2428) Bad night (1034)
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  (619): View more from California

  Be still, my beating vagina.

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  (619): Be still, my beating vagina. http://tfl.nu/qyal
  Replies (22) Good night (4618) Bad night (1215)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.

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  (904): you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck. http://tfl.nu/a9rr
  Replies (9) Good night (2876) Bad night (1044)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.

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  (937): I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem. http://tfl.nu/odx7
  Replies (22) Good night (1578) Bad night (578)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  omg his dad is hot

  (410): View more from Maryland

  ... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.

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  (412): omg his dad is hot (410): ... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives. http://tfl.nu/revq
  Replies (1) Good night (673) Bad night (361)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."

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  (973): Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel." http://tfl.nu/he4q
  Replies (2) Good night (798) Bad night (423)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.

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  (920): Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass. http://tfl.nu/fgjj
  Replies (0) Good night (638) Bad night (490)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.

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  (412): I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls. http://tfl.nu/kdxo
  Replies (1) Good night (614) Bad night (398)

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