Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Randomize
