Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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