are you still at the devil's house?
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
