Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
