Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
