My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
