Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
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frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
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I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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