arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
