three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
