peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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