Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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