the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
