U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Randomize