READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
