Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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