i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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