You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
