i permit you to call me
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I think I am morally bankrupt
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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