I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
