So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize