So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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