love makes seman taste better
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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