Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
