im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He felt like a one man threesome
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Randomize