More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
