We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
