We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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