New game: find the sober person in Tbell
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
