I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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