I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Come see our sink grown plant.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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