So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
