i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
