Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
