I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
