i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
The power of my boobs compel you
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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