Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
