i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize