But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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