i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
This is the high leading the old right now
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
