The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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