bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
