oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
