I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Randomize
