evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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