once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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