Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
