I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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