i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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